yakalskovich | Les Misérables -- 2000 French TV miniseries -- Part 3

We start again with Javert walking silently through a location, apparently the police prefecture
Hello exposition about the sewers, and hello Patron-Minette!
Marius goes to see Javert, huh? And gets a pistol right away??
'Moi, je pense...' oh, Marius thinks things? And Javert immediately twists his arm about the thinking thing.
He wants to entrap the Patron-Minette -- with me or against me?? What?
Oh, this is where this Javert is an impoverished nobleman. And he explains why the hunt excites him. Arouses, him, almost, from the use of 'exciter' in that context.
Asparagus in January? In 1832?? What are you even talking about, Thénardier?
What a weird speech from the man. And now Marius has a BSOD over the fact that this is Thénardier.
Lots of secret policmen in their very discreet uniform of badass longcaot and stovepipe hat.
Valjean burns himself on the poker. Tough old fellow! But he does threaten Éponine.
And flees through the window before Javert even sees him. Also, no 'Do you want my hat' or 'Your shot will misfire'. Pity -- those are badass lines.
Christian Clavier as Thénardier acts rings around Depardieu as well. I'm sorry, man, but most other people here are much more impressive than you.
Okay, now revolutionaries. I wish I knew which was which.
Toussaint is a man here!
Oh hi Éponine and Cosette! And snark. Definitely not friends, these two young ladies.
And Éponine meets the Patron-Minette in the sewers. Planning to free the Thénardiers, and to attack the Rue Plumet.
Éponine first demands that Marius should sleep with her, then she declines because it would be awful for him, and then she declares she loves him and runs away. What?
Marius is on the gate and makes a strange speech. And Toussaint has a very, very strange leather belt.
Valjean is very changeable -- now he is the perfect gentleman again. He talks more when he is a gentleman; he talked more as M. Madeleine than as Fauchelevent.
Ohai -- so this is Courfeyrac! Finally, names are being dropped.
The police invade the Sorbonne -- how can they? And then Javert speechifies at Marius.
He tells Marius it is his duty to have many children for the good of France? What?
Why did Valjean buy Cosette a black dress -- in that time, it meant mourning. Nothing else possibly.
Now I remember where I had seen that fellow who plays Marius!
They seem to be moving out of Rue Plumet shortly after they moved in?
Instead of internal monologues, Valjean monologises at Toussaint, who can't speak.
Thénardier: too stupid to escape from prison. He forgot to make a rope.
And everybody else waits outside the gates until Gavroche talks Thénardier down -- how stupid are these people??
And the Patron-Minette are incredibly superstitious.
Enjolras, in his underwear, in his student digs, where there is a sleeping Marius, a tiny printing press on the table, and a noisy uprising outside the window! That is the life!
Here, it's actually the people who rise up -- these are working people in blue!
Okay, Enjolras and Courfeyrac. I know them now. And they have guns.
Old Fauchelevent asks the abbess's blessing to join the revolution -- what??
'Les Misérable' -- what's with the repeated title drops?
Why is Cosette always in her bed and sleeping? Not even a teenager can sleep that much. She's not a cat!
Her letter, entirely legible on the blotter in the mirror -- how stupid are all these people?? Nobody knows any subterfuge except Javert and Gavroche.
And then, Valjean shouts at Toussaint and hits him. And raves in jealousy.
He mentions Javert to Cosette? She knows about the Gorbeau tenements and the trap of the Thénardiers? What?
Javert is still lurking in the Café Musain (or is this the wine shop?) with his telltale secret police uniform of badass longcoat and stovepipe hat. I will have to make jokes about Javert's Secret Police now...
All these dusty historical props!
Gavroche tells Enjolras that Javert is a police spy (as if the Secret Police uniform wasn't enough!) and he still does nothing -- why?? Javert's still skulking around there looking majorly shifty, and nobody does anything.
In the middle of the uprising, Javert flashes his badge at them? What??
Finally they do, but Javert doesn't even resist being tied to that post. And the tying-up is incredibly amateurish. And he has his notebook with him. Now, Javert caught the stupid as well.
Gavroche pretends to be shot -- a cheap call-forwards, as everybody knows Gavroche gets shot.
Enjolras is a fine fanatic, more than a golden sunny idealist -- I think that is correct.
Somebody gives Valjean a classical round bomb as if out of a comic strip, with a fuse on it, and he staaaares at it.
And here is Éponine, still in her tattered finery, not dressed as a boy.
And bam, she's shot! And Marius threatens to blow up the entire barricade.
Now Éponine gets up all bleeding, and clambers over the barricade, groaning.
As she dies, talking and talking, and drowning in her own blood, Éponine keeps repeating Marius' name again and again in her long explanation of everything.
And then, she is dead, Valjean insists on meeting Marius, and then the episode ends.

Yeah. VJ would not dig that at all. A quick Google search reveals that Marius gave Thenardier 150,000 francs for 'saving' his father. Which, wow. I forgot it was much. Marius, you really are a bloody fool. *kicks*

And he used it to trade in human suffering -- argh, yes, bloody fool indeed!

Les Misérables -- 2000 French TV miniseries -- Part 3

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